What started all this?
First off, let's be clear - it wasn't because I believe I'm a natural author. Or to make money, alleviate boredom or from wanting to see my name on a book spine. .
My favourite Christian film God's Not Dead made me realise the power of Christian fiction - stories, rather than facts, that explain the Gospel (the good news about Jesus Christ). I then twigged that this was just what Jesus did when he told parables. A little later I read the book by Hannah Buckland entitled Rebecca Stubbs : The Vicar's daughter (the first novel I'd read quoting the Bible passage John 3:16) and thought - perhaps I could write something like this. (I say perhaps - because the last piece of fiction I wrote was a short essay in an O-level English exam - which I failed first time around!) And maybe I could take the teaching up a peg or two. And, like Hannah, hear that someone had come to faith because of the book.
So, in February 2017, in a Penzance pub, soaked to the skin after walking the coastal path, the first words were written. The story was largely complete inside 6 months. From then till now, I've been working on reducing its length by almost 50% and improving the writing quality. The final version certainly isn't literary excellence, but it's way way better than the first draft.
What are your hopes for the book?
That at least one copy will reach someone who doesn't believe in Jesus and what they read will be the first step on a journey leading to salvation.
Do you like what you have written?
Yes, I do. It's not as good as I'd wish. The writing quality - word choice, sentence structure, story development, verbosity etc. - could all be improved. (It could do with the attention of a good Editor, but as yet I haven't found one.) And the theology may not always be 100.0%. But I think, after some four years of editing and re-writing, it's good enough to spread the word of God truthfully.
I've must have read every chapter more than one hundred times but, even so, many passages still affect me emotionally, as I relive the pain and happiness the characters experience. But maybe that's a little because I'm an emotional guy - it's only recently I've been able to watch certain scenes in God's Not Dead without a few tears. Or it could be that little voice inside me which, every time I read a Christian truth, shouts "Isn't it fantastic to believe in a God like this!"
Why do you believe?
Simple answer - because way back at the start of time, that was God's plan for me. And he used people and circumstances, to give me His truths in a way that I could accept. But it wasn’t a journey I’m proud of.
I never went to church as a child. My parents believed, and Mum got me saying prayers as a kid - but that was as far as my knowledge of God went. School gave me boring ‘Scripture’ lessons, and, in morning assembly, hymn tunes that I liked, but where the words meant very little. A quirk of fate, in the form of illness, took me out of a confirmation class I was beginning to enjoy, and stopped the school rubber-stamping my education “confirmed”.
God didn’t get a serious look-in, until, now married, we moved to Wiltshire. With a nice house, good job and a loving wife, outwardly everything would have looked good. But it wasn't underneath, and when a friendly lady delivered the Parish Magazine, and spoke warmly about the local church, it seemed right to give God another try.
Bob Lenten, Vicar of Lacock, preached sermons that I could understand. That, along with weekly Bible study meetings, often attended by twenty or more, and genuine warmth of welcome by many of the congregation, changed my life forever. Through Bob's teaching, I realised I could have a fresh start with God because of Jesus' death on the Cross. A prayer of repentance started me of in a right relationship with God, and a confirmation service made it "official" for the Church of England.
But the happiness didn't last long. There were sins that, although I knew I had forgiveness, I couldn't stop. And the biggest was probably personal ambition. At any cost. To my parents, other people and most seriously to my wife. This was the reason I refused Marion’s wish to start a family. It seemed an OK thing to do then, but now it fills me with shame. She should have walked away and found a better husband, but her love, demanding perpetual forgiveness, and a belief in marriage, stopped this. Perhaps God was telling her to stick with this poor chap, and stay the course.
I had sparks of faith, amidst my selfish living. Like attempts to help a Christian girl, who worked for me, and had walked away from God. They ended disastrously. But, still believing I could do good things for God, I joined the Bible Society, to look after systems and project manage their relocation from London. The job worked OK, but after eighteen months, my ambition to get back into a job paying market rates, meant a job move. To another IT job, working in London, with a daily journey from Wiltshire.
Where God was in all this and how he viewed by behaviour, I never thought much about. The new job was a success and great fun. But exhausting. With 17 hour days including weekends. I threw myself into work. No church, no time for God or wife. Look after number one, me, was my maxim.
Getting mugged, while wandering around the sleazy parts of Bristol one night, made me realise what a mess my life was in. I abandoned an IT career, and with Marion, bought an hotel in Wales. A new start I thought, spending time with my wife, and perhaps at last being the sort of husband I should always have been.
But once again, this didn't work out as I'd dreamed. The hotel was large, run down and needed slavish labour from both of us just to survive. But I thrived on this. God, husband responsibilities went out of the window and my wife now became just another, albeit very capable, unpaid member of staff. Achievement ruled but at big personal cost. In 17 years, we never went on holiday together and usually slept in separate parts of the hotel. But it worked, materially. We doubled the hotel size, and earned it a place as one of Wales best loved 3* country house hotels.
Once again, less than honourable behaviour on my part, provided the stimulus to move into semi-retirement. After flirting with the idea of running a B&B, we bought a domestic property in Devon and Marion studied to become a Reader in the Church of England. And a very good one she was. I drove buses and then did freelance IT work.
I think it was at this point that God came back into my life big time. I attended a lot of church services and, in my support of Marion, got involved with church administrative systems, websites and the use of digital organ music. This worked well for a year or so, but my outspoken nature and obvious contempt for the shoddy performance and behaviour of both church and lay officials, brought this to an abrupt end. About this time, Marion's health, the stress of working for the Church of England - not helped by the arrival of a new vicar - pushed her into retirement. With my working life at an end, I was now able, (or do I mean 'had no choice'?) to give my wife of some 40+ years, the attention she deserved.
Far from idle, I was now able to organise each day without outside constraints. And that gave me time to think back, realising I was approaching life's-end. But not because I was sick, more that there was now no chance, of realising long held fantasies of worldly success. And to my horror, I now saw clearly the foolishness and worse, in the way I had lived, the pain I'd gone through, and inflicted on others.
These memories filled my mind, day and night. It was like God giving me a film show of my past life. And showing me, a bit like Footprints in the Sand, that since my commitment to Jesus, genuinely given some 40 years ago, God had never left me. And despite my ignoring him, repeatedly trashing every Commandment (except taking a life), he’d still stuck with me. And saved me, time and time again, from injury, disgrace, serious illness, divorce, prison. And that all the time, I knew it, deep down. But too often, I pushed him away. Perhaps, for the first time, the words of that great hymn, What a friend we have in Jesus, really meant something.
Fuelled by writing the book, and the many good internet sources of faith-related material, made me realise how important it is to have an early-life strong relationship with God. And how much, I wished I'd had just that. Yes, God had saved me from many an earthly disaster, but how much better I could have lived, if I'd kept him close. How much sadness I'd have saved many people. I had two very loving and kind parents, who I'd have been devastated to lose at 17, as happened to Peter in the book. But, in a lot of other ways, I wish I had two teachers like Janet and Charlene.
And that is the core of The Cornish Vicar’s Daughter - how God shaped the lives of three teenagers to live as he wanted. As I wrote, I could see myself so clearly, in the lostness of the book character Peter.
I've had made a number of attempts to share my faith with non or back-slidden believers, often on my own but occasionally as part of a church initiative. With no obvious success. So this book is a last shot - a swan-song. It's in God's hands to decide if this is yet another failure.
Why did you pick a teenage story set back in the 1960's
The main theme of the book is that personal development in teenage years shapes later life. That's the time to sort out what you believe and use this to guide your future. In the book, Peter represents a messed up character cast adrift in life by his parents death. Had God not stepped in, the prognosis for his future life would have been bleak.
Writing a present day teenage story wouldn't have been as true to life, because of the absence of personal experience. And God's viewpoint on the main topics - relationships, behaviour, love, sex and faith - is unaffected by time. This means that although society's view on same-sex relationships, pre-marital sex, pornography and behaviour standards may have changed radically since the 1960's, God's haven't. And his view is what counts and so should be used to teach today.
Has writing the book affected you and your faith?
Absolutely. By thinking though what the characters do and say and researching the Christian view on the challenges they face. And when tiredness and boredom tempt me to watch material I shouldn't, I'll often re-read Janet's mini-sermon on pornography. And when a medical report reminds Marion and I that we're not going to life for ever, the books reminder of the reality of eternal life is a comfort.
Who do you hope will read this book?
It's mainly for people who do not yet have Christian faith. Who might read the book as a human interest story and along the way, learn some Christian truths which will encourage them to find out more from a church or believer-friend. I don't see it ever making the shelves of your typical Christian bookshop, because of the strong language and sexual content.
Will you ever write another novel?
I hope so. Endhills. This tells of another Peter, this time nearing the end of his life. Motivated by a disturbing dream, he tries to share his faith by sending a video to a girl he once new briefly, a half-century ago. Hurt by her refusal to even talk to him and personal tragedy, his faith is slipping away when this girl, unexpectedly makes contact. With her childhood faith strengthened by his efforts, but still resenting Peter's interference, she's shocked to find out his seemingly unshakeable belief is crumbling. Should she back away, in case his words damage the belief she is clinging to? Or does love, decades old, mean she has to help, whatever the cost?
Do you believe the faith statements made in the book?
Absolutely. Let me be specific...
- The only route to salvation (heaven, eternal life) is believing Jesus Christ died for our sins.
- You cannot earn God's forgiveness.
- God will forgive every sin if we are genuine in our sorrow and wish to change.
- God's love is for everyone, regardless of what sins they commit. It cannot be increased or decreased by anything we do.
- Heaven is real. And so is hell, which is where everyone who doesn't accept God's gift of grace through his son will end up.
- Same-sex relationships are a sin.
- Pre-marital sex is sin.
- Anything to do with porn is sin.
- God's spirit is active and provides the power to battle the devil today.
- The devil [Satan] is a real and dangerous power.
- The Ten Commandments apply to our lives today. No exceptions. We must try our best to keep them but realise that succeeding 100% is impossible, which is why God's rescue plan through Jesus is so important.